They say that 95% of all automobile accidents including vehicular homicide, are caused by white pants. It’s impossible to look away. If companies were smart, they would place their advertisements on white pants. There is something so intriguing about white clothing. The translucent nature of the color makes you feel like you’re getting away with something if you sneak a peak. For a girl to wear white on the bottom takes a lot of sand. Either you have it or you don’t. Even one badly timed move and your entire backside can take a different shape exposing the cottage cheese lines that you were hoping took a vacation week. Things need to be good under the hood for white pants to be in your wardrobe. If you’re a dark carpeted girl, you should make sure things are tidy and then double check, triple check if you have to. The last place to keep a secret is in white pants. The only thing that is more powerful then the white pant, is the white everything. If you throw on a white top and white pants, you’re not asking for attention, you’re demanding it. Zippers are for sluts. Buttons are the fasteners for royalty. When you see a row of buttons like this, don’t expect to see anything but a lady. Do I recommend white? Well of course, I think it’s awesome. Do I think it’s for everyone? Hell no. As long as we live in the world of the all you can eat buffet ,white for the first time since a Wayan’s movie, will be a minority. I wish we were in a position to see more white pants, but part of the allure is the rarity. I think if you’re wearing white pants, you’re Flashion, if you’re wearing white pants and I can see your High School Music tattoo, then you’re Trashion. Also, make sure you have clean undies on when you wear white pants. Hope to see you soon white pants!

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