It’s not a costume party, or Halloween, not even a kinky sex fetish. This is civil war reenacting. I don’t know the origin of this picture, whether it was taken live or found  in someone’s online photo album, frankly, I don’t care. This is an absolute gem. Major Load over here is representing the Confederacy in General Robert E. Lee’s army.  Authenticity is clearly not the goal of this soldier. In that day and age, it was impossible for someone to look like this at this point in their life, most meals were far more nutritious and there was no television to sit around watching all day. Enough about the size, that’s none of my business, if he wants to stimulate the fast food economy, power to him. I don’t agree with reenacting the Civil War, it’s a low point in American history. I also think in today’s current events, it’s disrespectful to play soldier when so many young people are in a war that is not make believe. So not only does this guy look terrible, he is a terrible person. Ever wonder what it looks like to put 5 gallons of water in a 1 gallon jug, just look at the picture. Every fiber in that outfit is being tested. One cough and it turns into pieces. It can’t even be buttoned, just too much mass. Elephants are naked for a reason, clothes aren’t meant to endure that type of stress. Civil War outfits will never be a trend. Nothing pretty about this uniform, and the feelings behind it make it even uglier. It’s a real travesty if a person of this size can pay the same for a shirt as a person of more ordinary stature. Fat is where it’s at, I’ll stop hating, you’re big boned anyway, not fat. It’s okay to be tubby, just dress appropriately. I don’t want to see your big belly, especially when I can hear things crying for help from inside. I think live action role-players are way better then war re-enactors. At least in role-playing, there is some imagination, the Civil War ends the same way every time. Just like the real rebels from the south, war re-enactors aren’t getting any. He can keep those buttons undone as much as he wants, no one is touching that last one. I don’t recommend this, only put it on if you’re going to get extra credit in social studies. Trashion. Virgin.

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